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Cat's Protection League

by Roger McGough

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Midnight. A knock at the door
Open it? Better had
Three heavy cats, mean and bad.

They offer protection. I ask, "What for?"
The Boss-cat snarls, "You know the score.
Listen man, and listen good

If you wanna stay in the neighbourhood
Pay your dues or toms will call
And wail each night on the backyard wall

Mangle the flowers, and as for the lawn
A smelly minefield awaits you at dawn."
These guys meant business without a doubt

Three cans of tuna, I handed them out
Then they disappeared like bats into hell
Those bad, bad cats from the CPL.

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